Do you hear the drums, Osama?

I feel a bit like Noah resting safely in his ark while he sends the dove and the raven out to scout for dry land. I have been sitting comfortably here in the UK while various friends venture into foreign parts. They’ve all got back safely so it’s time to bite the bullet. Tomorrow we fly out to Sweden for wedding+honeymoon v2. Changed names will be registered in the land of Best Beloved’s birth, inlaws finally get to meet each other and for the first time since 1989 I will be driving a left-hand drive car on the wrong, i.e. the right side of the road. Should be fun. Oh, and another (slightly lower key) wedding blessing next Sunday, in Swedish. So by the end of August we will be about as married as you can get.

The airline says all flights are behaving as normal – possibly because al-Quaida have got them confused with the other SAS, possibly because Sweden hasn’t really done anything to upset the fundamentalists. Or indeed anyone, much, though it’s possible Napoleon was none too impressed when they poached one of his marshals and persuaded him to turn against his former Emperor, with the minor bribe of ‘why not be our king while you’re about it?’ A royal family descended from a French turncoat! (Is there another kind?) They’ll be descended from illegitimate Vikings living in the north of France next.

True, they gave us some of the ugliest cars on the road. They also gave us Abba, Ikea and a stealth warship, which is my particular favourite and way cooler than a Volvo. Anyway, Abba on its own makes up for just about everything. Would al-Quaida be half as unpleasant if they listened to 'Dancing Queen' or 'Super Trouper' every day? Let alone 'People Need Love' or 'He Is Your Brother'. Somehow I doubt it. Driven to the point of psychosis, yes. Unpleasant, no.

See you in a week.