Son of an MP

MPs do have a reputation for increasing the population by means other than the sanctity of the marriage bed. It's probably unfair and grossly exaggerated ... and yet, I'm sure you can name more MPs who have sired sprogs the wrong side of the sheets than you can fellow co-workers.

I had a sudden insight into why this might be when listening to the Today programme report on Charles Kennedy, the sixth Tracy brother, and the treatment he received yesterday in the House. Now the Conservatives have set the trend for changing leaders, it seems certain people are rather hoping the Lib Dems are going to follow it. Or put another way, if CK isn't yet in an IDS situation, they very soon hope he will be even if they have to manufacture it themselves. Anyway -- "Mr Charles Kennedy", intones the Speaker, and the entire august body of honorable members erupts in laughs, jeers and catcalls. It was like a five year old's birthday party, but with less measured debate.

A quick Google tells me that the average age of MPs in 2005 is 51, meaning that most are of an age to have young-to-teenage children. But if that is the kind of behaviour Daddy gets up to, how can you ever hope to be entrusted with the responsibility of raising offspring? If kids look to their parents as exemplars then the children of the present House will be tomorrow's looters and rioters.

As Eric Burdon of The Animals once said, it's very hard to raise a kid when you're best known for singing "It's my life and I'll do what I want." I'd have said he's best known for singing about a Louisiana brothel, but I suppose the end result is the same.

Anyways, it follows that since any kind of responsible family life for an MP is out of the question, the only way to propagate is to inseminate your mistress and let her take the rap for the child rearing. Put that way, being an MP's bit on the side is almost a civic duty, which is surely the only possible explanation for the late Robin Cook's private life.